I'm glad for this time alone. It's called Spring Break by school systems, but I call it Easter break. Since I started teaching, this is the week for some serious down time right smack in the middle of the most intense part of the school year.
For me, it's all about getting quiet, still, being alone, and doing some serious inner work. It doesn't matter how much good you think you are doing in this world, or in your own little community, it usually becomes obvious that no matter what you do or how you do it, there is more work to do. It never seems to end. I'm talking about the work that goes on inside, in your heart, in your mind, in your soul.
Each year, the time seems to fly by faster... I hear other people saying the same thing. And not just folks my age. I hear the younger teachers saying the same thing, how fast this year has flown by. But in reality, that can't be... time passes by the same steady increments which we measure by clock and calendar, so it can't really be going any faster. That means it must be our perception of time we are experiencing as passing by faster than usual. Then why? Why does it seem to be going faster?
I can only think it must have something to do with what we are doing, the time frame in which we are expected to do it, and the sense that time is running out for us. Teachers have a sense that everything from now to the end of the year is review... we have taught them the year's curriculum, and now we review so that kids who will be tested will be ready to pass those tests in May.
I'm sure people in other careers are experiencing similar pressures if their year starts anew in the fall and comes to a close in the summer. As a teacher, this is how I experience it.
Anyone with kids in the house knows that the new year really begins in August/September, not January. New clothes to buy and school supplies, new teachers, new classrooms, even new friends are likely as kids return to school, one grade higher. Autumn reminds us that change is everywhere, not just in the falling amber-red-gold leaves, but in our focus to prepare for the cold months ahead. There's cold-weather clothes to pull out and summer clothes toput away (if you don't have growing kids, because if you do, unless you can use hand-me-downs, those kids are going to need new clothes within months), closets to clean, yard implements to put up, and ballgames to watch. It's almost as if we are preparing for a long sleep, and if we were bears, we'd at least have that to look forward to!
During the winter we seem to be hibernating, mentally if not physically, following the madness of the October/November-January holidays (Halloween, Thanksgiving, Christmas, New Year's), and it's too cold and wet to go outside anyway. But who feels like cleaning a house in the winter when all you want to do is snuggle up and keep warm, get cozy, and sleep? With longer nights, it all seems perfectly natural to hibernate. I love the winter for that, except like most of us, I have a job, and hibernation doesn't fit well in the schedule. Our minds seem to go to sleep in the winter ... probably because the days are shorter and the nights longer.
Then the morning alarm wakes us up... it's Spring! All of a sudden, the taxes need to be mailed in ... and for procrastinators, there is a panic/rush to get them done. Trees are abloom, dogwoods, pear, cherry, azaleas, rhododendrons, and flowers burst out of the ground, daffodils, tulips, roses, lilies, among them. Property owners look over their yards and homes, pull out the lawnmowers, shovels, and high pressure water hoses. There is much work to be done to prepare yards for new growth, and homes for a good cleaning or make-over. . . there is a feeling of starting over, a new beginning filled with hope, much like the one we experience in the fall with the start of school.
Just when we think we can't go another week, Easter comes along, a time of renewal. Many go away on vacation... we used to, when our son was younger. A week at the beach was usually our favorite past-time this time of year. Last year, my husband and I drove to Alabama to be with my mom, but this year I would have to drive alone, and the drive is too long for me to make alone. So I stayed home instead.
I'm glad I did. I feel like I'm on a real vacation, and I didn't even have to pack the bags, or drive 400 miles, or fill up the gastank five times. I get to sleep in my own bed, see my doggies every day, walk in my yard whenever I feel like it (which hasn't been often for the past three very cold days), and go shopping in local stores that are having some great sales. I even got caught up on my ironing, and washed some floors.
Maybe it's because I'm getting older, or perhaps it's because during the school year my world is limited, for the most part, to the needs of all the students I teach. I think many of us have a focus to maintain throughout the year, to get through the year, to balance jobs with family and church life. Though I try to put order into my life, chaos always has a way of following me, surrounding me, invading me. Which is why the concept of Sabbath as a day of rest is so important to me, as it probably is to many others. We should all get at least one day of rest.
But then there is Easter Sunday, a day of joyful remembrance, and the week following Easter. I'm getting a Sabbath week. A good time to get to the heart of the matter, of what's important, of what makes me happy. There is prayer, reading the Word, meditation, reflection, writing... seeking the presence of He who moves me, because without Him, I am a lazy, lazy person.
I pray that those of you who seek the Holy Spirit receive the time that has been granted to you, as a gift. Whether it's a few minutes a day, an hour, or a week, it is time well received. I thank my pastor for reminding me of that. He said it's not about making time to be with God, but in receiving the time that He has given to you. I should make good that time He has given me, to rest in the Lord, to wait with patience, to be still. Only then can I find peace in my heart and soul, put order into my life, and to be available for whatever mission or opportunity that presents itself.
May you never stop seeking to be with the One who moves you.
