Mother and Grandmother Laid to Rest Today

Steve's grandmother's funeral was today. She lived about a two hour drive from our home, in the foothills of North Carolina, and was laid to rest at Shady Grove Baptist Church. All her children, most of her grandchildren, great grandchildren, and even some great-great grandchildren were in attendance.

The woman left an impressive family legacy behind: with her devoted husband, she birthed and raised six children, who gave them 18 grandchildren, 31 great grandchildren, and 20 great-great grandchildren, with two on the way that I know of. She also raised a foster son. One of her sons died last year, and her husband died about 15 years ago.

She has been ready to join him ever since. No woman has been more disappointed to wake up in the mornings as she! More than once she would tell us of her desire to fall asleep and not wake up. She missed her man so much. We all saw the great love she had for her Zeno, both before he died and after.

None of us would have believed she could live to be almost 100 years old! Her memory was intact nearly to the end, and her ability to tell stories of her girlhood captured our attention at family gatherings. Her failing vision made it difficult for her to recognize her family if they stood too far away, and her hearing made it nearly impossible to have a normal conversation with her, but she always welcomed her grandchildren and great-grands with open arms and a sharp wit.

In the end, it was a fall that broke her hip that sent her to the hospital two weeks ago, followed by a couple of ministrokes that made her departure from this world possible.

I know if she could have spoken, she would have said, "Thank you, Jesus!" Her daughter described her passing as peaceful. She did not appear to be in any pain. She looked up, then closed her eyes, and took her last breath.

Speaking of her daughters (there are three of them), I'd like to say this about them. These are three of the most dedicated daughters a mother could wish for. They went out of their way, I mean extremely out of their way, to make sure their mother's wish to live at home until the end was a reality.

My mother-in-law lives right next door and could easily walk to her mother's house every day to take care of her... and she did it for fifteen years. Her two sisters had to travel further. One lives ten miles away, another about 30 miles away. The three sisters took turns spending the nights and days with their mother when it became apparent that their mother could not be left alone. They fed her, took her to her doctor appointments, cleaned her house, washed her clothes, whatever it took, they did it.

I know of a few daughters in my church who  have that kind of committment for their moms today. These three ladies certainly did. It was an act of love, there is no doubt, and if they had to do it all over again, they would probably do the same.

Recently, it had become difficult for my MIL, the oldest sister, to help her mother out of a chair or out of a bed (she's 79 years old herself!). There had been talk of placing their mother in an assisted living home. Only talk. The sisters wanted to honor their mother's wishes above any sacrifice they had to make for her.

One thing that became apparent after the funeral, as we sat and talked to family members (my husband's cousins and aunts and uncles), was the common concern that with Grandma gone, the family would probably not get together as often as before, that we would lose touch. It was to her home that everyone gravitated during major holidays like Christmas and Easter, and her birthday. Well, some of the family gathered for her birthdays each year.

We live the furthest away. I will confess that since our drive was long, and because her birthday fell on New Year's Eve, we didn't make a second trip after the Christmas visit to honor her birthdays.  Generally, we were celebrating with our friends and/or neighbors on that night each year. I knew we should have attended her last one.  I'd be lying if I said I don't regret it.

Today Annie Collins was laid to rest. Her children are relieved that she is no longer suffering. Finally, she can join her husband. More importantly, she is with her Lord.